Who puts an ATM in a clothing store?!!!!

So, Melissa has written a lot of this out in her blog (this is supposed to be "our blog," but it really is more "mine." That is fairly depressing in itself because I always said that blogs were gay. Anyway...) but her version of this story is a little different than mine. Perception is everything, and perspective defines perception. Read closely, as I will use that phrase again before this post is through.

I'd written Melissa on Facebook and had sort of made a date to go out the Saturday before I moved out o' town, but Melissa thought it'd be a good idea to call me and verify that we were still on. Fair enough. She of course had never met me, and it's never a bad idea to double check, in case this random dude from the giganet happens to be a flake. And besides, I'd given her my number and told her she could call me in hopes that she would. I feel it helps to have at least heard a person's voice before a blind date, that way you can be a little more sure that the person is real, and in my case not a dude. I found out later that even though she thought it'd be good to call as well, she first did a full background check on me to make sure I wasn't some deviant who might require her to use that rape whistle girls carry around on their necks. Anyway, moving on!!

I'd expected that if she was going to call, it'd have been a little earlier in the week, but apparently the bio-scans she was running on me didn't bring back promt results as I didn't hear from her until that Friday. I was at a swing dance club in Sacramento at the time, but since I'd missed the instruction at the beginning, I was a little lost and not having a great time. Also I had just found out that I was finally being forced to leave as soon as the weekend was over, and the girl I was at this club with was engaged. It was nice to have a good reason to hang out outside for a few minutes, so I was perfectly ok when Melissa called. All confirmed: the date was on, and it was up to the out-of-towner to find a good place to go.

The next day was Saturday, as everyone who has graduated 1st grade should remember comes after Friday. I drove out to Napa to pick her up and take her out to what I had planned to be a nice little lunch in wine country. However, I first had to get through the awkward stage of meeting the girl. Luckily for me, she's a hottie! That being said, when she answered the door, I muddled out an introduction and she asked me to come inside for a minute. First objective: completed. Next objective: meet the parents. This would make most guys fairly nervous, especially in a situation where the girl doesn't know you as yet and can't vouch for you before you get there. But not me. I figured, "what's the worst that could happen? They won't like the look of me and won't want their daughter going out with me again?" Whatever... I was moving! Besides, generally I get along with the prospective girl's parents. Only on rare occation have I made a bad first impression with a date's parents. (I wish I could say the same for dates!) So I step inside and here comes a man who sounds like he is in a big hurry to get to the door. Her father eagerly shakes my hand, almost as if he was more glad that I was taking his daughter out than either of us were. That was a little weird, and my first reaction was, "Come on, be a little protective of her! If I had a hot daughter, I'd be trying to scare the guy into having an epileptic seizure, or at least making him fear death if he even thinks something wrong!" But all in all, it was a good first meeting. Objective two: completed.

Objective three: not make a complete fool of myself...... ok, there was a little hiccup with this one. Firstly, I had planned to take Melissa out for a late lunch type of "dinner" (less formal, less intimidating) but as I didn't know any good places (not being from California) I had to do research online to find a restaurant. I chose a place that sounded like it had awesome desserts. I'm sure that it did, but we never found out because when we got there we learned that the place only serves real food for about 15 minutes every day. Objective three: not looking so great at the moment. But it didn't stop there.

Secondly, in light of my misunderstanding of what "dinner" is supposed to entail, Melissa suggested a little mexican place not too far from where we were. Ah, a woman after my own heart! (though I was trying to stay away from things that might make me a little more musical than I had intended on being, if you catch my drift) It was a nice place. We were there for a while talking, plus the burritos we ordered were the size of a small country, or at least Rhode Island. After a while we figured we'd better get going if we were going to catch the movie I'd planned to take her to. So we get the check, I throw down the debit card, and we were shortly on our way..... oh wait, I forgot this one little detail: they only take cash. I thought the waitress was pulling my chain a bit at first. MY BAD!! I thought we were living in the 21st century. Apparently, this restaurant was built in the jurassic period! I've lived in the ghetto before, and even in those places they've caught up with modern technology,.... you just have to pay more. So I ask, "do you have an ATM?" Silly me, that would be too easy! "No we don't, but Mervyn's does." "OK. Where's Mervyn's?" She replied, "Right across the street." Lies!!!!! In Napa, right across the street must mean, "on the other side of that hill, over the creek with the footbridge that has holes in it... watch out for the troll that lives under there. He'll ask few questions and you should be right back on your way... cross the protester's pickett line, and walk a few miles through a desert wasteland, and you're there. You can't miss it!" I guess this is the perfect time to repeat myself: Perception is everything, and perspective defines perception. Well I did miss it,... repeatedly. I kept having to run back and forth in front of the restaurant searching for this place. When I finally found it, I was stupid enough to think that the ATM would be inside of the store. I'm a dummy!! I finally found the ATM, rushed back to the table where I had left my date sitting alone for the past few hours, paid the bill and left. Objective three: pretty much impossible at this point!

We went to the movie theatre in downtown Napa and saw Prince Caspian. I had to make up for the disasters that had previously occured, so I started brainstorming for ideas to win back some points I'd lost over dinner. The best that I came up with was as we were sitting down in our seats. I looked at her, and holding the removable armrest I said, "Ok, let's set some ground rules. You get fresh with me, and this comes down. Got it?" She laughed, and I pretended that this was the first time I had ever used that line. (Melissa, if you're reading this... sorry. =P ) It didn't quite make up for the preceding blunders, but it helped. We watched the movie and the whole time kept thinking about what I should do next. I kept having to remind myself that she litteraly just got home from a mission, so I didn't want to scare her off by being to flirty, nor would I want to seem too cold and uninterested. That's a fine line to walk, my friends. But all in all, it went well. There was no holding hands, no yawning-arm trick. But when I dropped her off I threw in the side hug. I thought I'd blown it, but I should say again: Perception is everything, and perspective defines perception. We talked a little more online before the move 2 days later, but the next time I would spend some time talking with her would be almost a week later. But that's a story for another post.